Let’s just be honest here. Being dumped is one of the worst feelings in the world. It knocks the wind out of you. You’re sitting there with your heart cracked open, wondering what the hell just happened while they’re off getting on with their life like you meant nothing.

Oh, I know how strong the urge is to try to fix it. To text. To reach out. To just understand. You want some kind of reply that makes the pain stop. You want to know if they regret it, if they miss you, if there’s still a chance. You want to try to convince them to return.

But let me tell you something that might just change everything.

Not a sad song on your story. Not a quote that screams I’m pretending to be fine. Not a message saying I just want closure.

The most powerful response is SILENCE!!.

Total radio silence. Zero access. Nothing. And it’s not about being cold. It’s about pulling your power back into your own body where it belongs.

That’s why I wrote my book Silence Is Your Superpower. Because I’ve seen too many good people, people just like you, doing no contact half-heartedly and then wondering why they still feel heartbroken. No contact done properly changes the game. It stops you bleeding out all over someone who walked away. It gives you room to breathe, to heal, to think straight again.

You’re not doing this to get them back. You’re doing this to get you back.

Let me tell you why it works …

You cannot heal while they still have access to you

Every time you reply to a text, stalk their socials, or even just keep their number on your phone, you’re leaving the door wide open for more pain to walk straight in. You might think you’re just being polite or keeping the peace. But really, you’re saying come on in and mess with my head a little more.

Honey, you deserve better than that. You don’t need more confusion. You don’t need more mixed signals. You don’t need to keep spinning in circles wondering what they mean when they say things like I miss you but I’m not ready.

You need peace. You need clarity. You need silence.

They know how to reach you if they wanted to

Let’s stop pretending they’ve forgotten your number. They know where you are. If they truly wanted to talk, they would. They wouldn’t be breadcrumbing you with random likes or sending you messages at 11pm when they’re lonely. If someone wants you, they show up. Properly. Clearly. Consistently.

The trith is that if they’re not doing that, then you’ve got your answer. You don’t need to chase it. You don’t need to remind them you exist. You don’t need to beg someone who already let you go.

You are not an option.

This is not about ego. It’s about your self-respect

When you go no contact, it’s not because you’re trying to win some game. It’s because you’re choosing yourself. You’re saying I might be hurting right now, but I am not going to keep giving my heart to someone who couldn’t take care of it. I might still love you, but I love me more.

And let’s be real here. Every time you contact them, you feel worse afterwards. You get that temporary high, a little shot of hope, and then the crash hits. It’s like a heartbreak hangover. And you deserve more than that vicious cycle.

Most people don’t actually want their ex back. They just want the pain to stop

That’s what this really comes down to. You’re not really craving them. You’re craving relief. You just want the ache in your chest to go away. And you think maybe, just maybe, if they said the right thing or came back with an apology, you’d feel better.

But it doesn’t work like that. Even if they reply, even if they say something nice, the ache doesn’t leave. Because it’s not about them anymore. It’s about how you feel about you now. And no one can fix that for you but you.

No contact is not about making them miss you. But let’s be honest … they probably WILL

When someone loses access to your energy, they notice. Especially if they were used to you always being there. Always replying. Always hoping.

But you don’t do this to get a reaction. You do this to get your soul back.

Oh, and the best part? One day, when the urge to text them hits you and you don’t act on it, you’re going to feel something brand new.

Pride.

That warm, strong, quietly powerful feeling that says I am finally putting myself first. I am finally showing myself the love I used to give away so easily … and that’s when everything changes.

So if you’re sitting here wondering whether to go no contact or not, take this as your sign.

Not only can you do it. You have to do it if you ever want to truly feel free.

If you’re ready to do it properly, my book Silence Is Your Superpower will walk you through every single step. I’ll show you how to stay strong when the urge to reach out hits. How to handle the silence. How to deal with the loneliness. And how to come out the other side feeling like the version of you that doesn’t settle for less than she deserves.

You’ve got this … and I’ve got you.

Kel x

Breakup Coach | Author of Silence Is Your Superpower